Monday, December 06, 2010

brief missive from the front lines

well, it is not going all that well in some ways, but in other ways, it's fine.  It is the night before the first paper is due, and that one--although it won't be a work of art-- is going to get done.  I project that by about 1:00 a.m. I will have something that is good enough so that I can go to bed, do some last minute editing tomorrow, and turn in on time.  But the next one, which is due on Thursday, a mere forty-eight hours after I turn the first one in, is a disaster.  But that's not why I thought I would check in briefly.  You already knew I would be panicking at this point, and I knew it, too.  But what is surprising me is this:  the paper I am writing, I like.  The reason why it has been so hard to make myself sit down and do this, to just get it done, is because I was so sure I was going to write a bad paper.  I was so sure it would be awful.  But it's not.  I can't guarantee I'll make a good grade on it, of course, no one can do anything about the grade they're going to receive.  But I can tell that I will be satisfied with the result.  Not as satisfied as I would be if I had given myself more time, but still.  This is OK.  So if I can dig myself out of the mess I'm in right now, it bodes well for next time.  Next time, if I have a little bit of confidence that I can write a good paper, maybe I won't put it off until the last possible second, and I'll have at least a small chance of coming through it with my sanity in better shape. 

so.  that's all.  Don't have time for anything more, honestly.  Just thought I'd poke my head up for a minute.

2 comments:

  1. And I, for one, am so glad you did. Sometimes just stepping back and getting that bit of perspective is all it takes. Now, about that second paper, take a deep breath, ask for guidance and inspiration, then... just go!
    Julie

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  2. thanks, Julie! It is funny making this transition-- there probably are two works of literature that are more different than Romeo and Juliet and Kafka's Metamorphosis, but offhand I can't think what they would be. Pretty big switch. :-) I let myself have about a three hour break when I got home and now I'm back at it.

    Hope the mall is treating you well.

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